One afternoon last week I was using the subway system and I was standing on the train, traveling to my next personal training client. As I stood reading, a young woman started touching my abdomen. This person is a stranger to me. She leaned in close and started brushing my stomach. I was shocked and didn’t do anything. I was so taken off guard at this weird behavior. I then asked her “Do I have a bug on me?” to that she replied “NO." I brushed it off and continued reading my book. As I walked off the train and climbed the stairs to exit the station I began to get angry and walking a little more aggressively than was necessary. I tripped on the final step. Why do strange people think they’re allowed to touch me? I wondered to myself.
Yes, I’m in the fitness business and that means I sometimes have to wear my fitness attire in public. I try not to for this very reason. I also don’t wear my leggings without covering my bum because I don’t want to hear random thoughts from people. Why do strange people think I care about their opinion of my appearance? Do they think I’ll be flattered if they approach me out of the blue and offer their unsolicited opinion as I stand on the train, reading my book and minding my own business? Most of all, why, why, do strange people think they’re allowed to touch me?
I actually felt pretty sassy that day. I had just had a great workout, slept well the night before and I had on a fun fitness outfit. Nothing skin tight, but flattering. I felt good. I felt beautiful, actually. Being touched by a stranger didn’t make me feel more beautiful; it made me feel unimportant. This woman wanted to touch me, so I was going to be touched, by a stranger, whether I wanted it or not. Did she consider that her gesture, perhaps intended to compliment, might mean something totally different to me? If she did, that didn’t stop her. Perhaps this behavior is because we live in a immediate gratification world where whatever you want is there for the taking. Maybe that is why strange people think they’re allowed to touch me – and any other person they feel like touching.
What do you think? What are your feelings on the topic? I want to hear from you!
