Odd ways to lose weight

There are so many weird ways people try to lose weight. I am always amazed by the lengths people will go to, to lose a few lbs. Here are a few that I have found that I want to share with you. Enjoy the laugh!

• BELT MASSAGER: Not only did this device promise quick weight loss, it also made it sound so easy! If someone wanted to lose weight, all they had to do was strap a few belts around their problem areas, stand still, and let this contraption jiggle the fat away.
• THE DRINKING MAN’S DIET: This diet proposed eating mainly low-carb foods, such as steak and lobster, paired with a cocktail, to lose weight. Dieters were instructed to consume no more than 60 carbs per day.
• TRIM TWIST: People wanting to shed a few pounds could stand on a rotating board, which moved as they twisted their midsections. The Trim Twist promised to firm sagging muscles, reduce pudgy areas, burn calories, and stimulate circulation. All anyone wanting to lose weight had to do was use this contraption for a few spare minutes per day, and they were promised to see results.

Some of these are so odd and clearly all you have to do is WATCH YOUR MOUTH and you will lose weight. If you’d rather not use your head maybe you can try one of these odd items to lose unwanted pounds.

Follow me on Instagram

Exercise Naked?

Exercise Naked

Being naked is a journey to finding our own true self, or so it is said by advocates of wearing no clothes. Naked exercising is free, uninhibited, and a bit embarrassing. It is trending in some New York City and LA gyms where whole-body workouts have been designed just for the under-dressed exerciser. The advantage is you don’t have to pack running shoes, gym shorts, or a tank top. You might need a towel around your neck to stop the sweat from running down your privates, but hey, more power to you.

Sweat wicking is a big when wearing exercise clothes. Wicking fabric pulls moisture from your body to the exterior of your clothes where it evaporates easily. Exercising naked does away with sweat-wicking fabrics. As you exercise, your sweat just flies everywhere. You don’t have to worry about washing t-shirts or exercise shorts, just take a shower after your session. Save on the laundry bill, and save money. You don’t have to keep up with the expensive workout clothes that you see in your gym.

Body Image

Be aware of your body image, forget stylish or grungy workout clothes. Just walk out into the gym and start exercising on your favorite machine without any clothes on. Think of these two things, however. First, it might be considered unsanitary so take a towel to sit on, and second you will probably be escorted out of the gym after you get dressed. But, hey, you might just start a trend.

Exercising naked is a great motivator. Visual clues are a wake-up call. You see your favorite shower towel lying next to your bed, and you know you have to get up and exercise before ever getting dressed. No more investing in workout clothes. You don’t have to go to the mall to stock up on shorts and t-shirts, you already have you workout clothes ready to go. By exercising naked, you will make great friends. You have conversation subjects ready and waiting – the new bruise you found on your butt, the tightening of you belly, and even the way your skin glistens when you sweat.

The trick is to find a gym that advocates being naked while exercising, or just exercise naked with a group of good friends. The advantage is you have nothing between you and your workout. You can feel free, move and bend easier, and get a great laugh while you do lunges.

Recently while walking through a neighborhood park, a very athletic runner shed everything but the shoes. He touched his toes a couple of times, stretched, and began running nude with all his might. Enter the local police agency. They chased him on their bikes, but he was so fast. Is this the same guy who runs streaking through sporting events? Maybe, but he was having a great time, you could tell.

Naked Yoga

Naked yoga? That’s a great possibility. You do your yoga poses in a darkened room, everyone is supposed to close their eyes, and no one can see your sagging butt as you lose your balance and hit the floor. Authentic yoga, or the yoga that is passed down from yogi masters and gurus, is supposed to reveal the inner peace in your soul. Meditation is awesome when you are uninhibited and unrestrained. Try it at your next yoga class, just remember, you will lose our concentration if you peek.

Follow me on Instagram

Disease is Trendy

Normal and healthy isn’t considered “cool” anymore. You need to have a disease to be considered hip. I know I’ve heard fake diseases from people that have “diagnosed” themselves. There are people that actually suffer from real medical issues. I guess people think “who cares, it’s all about ME anyway.”I am going to share my “favorite” disease.

Drumroll please. The best self diagnosis is Sociopathy.  Here is what you can expect from someone who claims they are sociopathic, cool, detached and a genius. Think DEXTER or your favorite VAMPIRE. So basically this medical issue allows you to be a serial killer. You can just blame the disease for your actions. I’m not sure a court of law would understand. My take: people just want to make their awkwadness or asswipe behavior acceptable.

Follow me on Instagram

Are diet pills a good idea?

Maybe your beach vacation is coming up faster than you planned. You shudder as you think about what you look like in your bikini.

Your best friend is getting married, and you want to look great standing next to her. There hasn’t been a time where the two of you look equally good in pictures, but maybe this is the day!

As everyone else pounds a beer and takes their shirt off for a day of fun in the sun, you’re the guy sulking around with his shirt on. “I’m sensitive to the sun,” you say.

Many people are unhappy with their weight. Often, people turn to diet pills to change their outward appearance. These pills are pricey and don’t have any real guarantee. Most aren’t even regulated by the FDA. Why do people continue to consume these pills?

Rest assured, you won’t find real weight loss with these pills. Now, you may discover that you have dropped a few pounds, but it’s likely water weight that will come right back once you stop taking the pills. Maybe your weight loss occurs because these magical little capsules have totally flushed out your system. Congratulations! You spent three consecutive days on the toilet while simultaneously losing your ability to keep any food inside your body. I hope you plan to live off water and crackers for the rest of your life. Many diet pills suppress your appetite. I, for one, actually enjoy eating. I’m not too fond of a pill that takes away one of life’s greatest pleasures.

Reality is that diet pills are an easy fix for weight loss. Didn’t your parents ever teach you that anything worth having in life is worth working for? The best way to lose weight and keep it off is to simply exercise and eat right. Diet pills wreak havoc on your body. If I’m going to destroy my body, it’s at least going to take place in the form of delicious pizza or pasta. Or pizza topped with pasta. Sugary margaritas wouldn’t be a bad choice either. The point is, people take diet pills hoping for some miraculous weight loss that simply won’t sustain itself. Our bodies are pretty stubborn, so changing the mechanics takes some good old-fashioned hard work and effort.

Follow me on Instagram

You have bad B.O.

Working out is great for you! You know from all the studies and lectures from your fanatical friend that working out has great benefits for both your mind and body. So please, start hitting the gym if you aren’t already. If you are working out, great job! That being said, it’s come to my attention that we need to discuss some basic gym etiquette.

If you look ready for a night on the town after your workout, you’ve done it all wrong. When you’re really working hard at the gym, you’re going to sweat. Sweaty situations require some preparation. First, you need to wear deodorant if you’re going to be at the gym. Your fitness class buddies don’t want to smell you from a few feet away, and neither does your instructor. There’s no reason that you linger at the bench press station long after your gone. If your smell is sticking to the equipment, you’ve got a situation. Please do not confuse deodorant and cologne/perfume. They don’t work the same, and it just makes the problem worse.

After you get your workout on, you clothes are going to smell a little. That’s okay because you’re going to head home and wash them. That is your plan, right? Under no circumstance should you wear dirty clothes from a previous workout to the gym. Aside from being unsanitary, it stinks up the gym. This is tenfold if you’re in a fitness class area that’s more enclosed than the gym as a whole.

Finally, please respect the fitness class goers around you. You and your classmates should be able to count on one another for support through the workout. They shouldn’t be forced to be in your vicinity when you pass gas. It takes a whole minute to step out of the room and spare your instructor and classmates that miserable experience.

When you follow gym etiquette, everyone gets a better workout. If you missed out on some of these rules, you may need to check into a middle school health class for a day or two to straighten it all out.